Remembering

I moved Washington, DC ten years ago.  I was a freshman in college, all bright-eyed and eager to make my mark in Washington and eventually the world at large.  I had only been here for less than a month when it happened.  I remember a lot of details from that day.  I remember getting up after my roommate left for her 8:30am class and turning on CNN, as was my routine by that point, and seeing the two burning towers. I remember walking into the still dark hallway of the dorms and hoping to see someone else awake that I could talk to.  I saw the girl who lived across the hall and told her what I saw.  I do not remember what she said, but I remember the look on her face.  I went to class, because I did not know what else to do.  Of course everyone was in shock and did not want to discuss Justice 104.  So instead we talked about terrorism.  In the middle of class I remember that one of the deans came in and said classes were canceled, the Pentagon had been hit and the towers had collapsed.  He told us to go back to the dorms and not to go downtown.  I walked back to the dorm in a daze.  I remember I couldn't call out because all the phone lines were going haywire.  So I emailed one of the only people I knew who would be sitting at the computer and had him call my dad, who I knew instinctively had left work and was waiting at home for my call.  My friend who did this for me, does not remember this. 

I remember everyone from my floor sitting in the common room and watching the television.  For some reason I couldn't bring myself to be with them.  So I sat in my room with my roommate and two of my friends.  Later I went to work at the campus bookstore.  I remember this was one of the only days when someone didn't yell at me for not having their book in stock.  They came in, they asked, then they looked like they wanted to get upset, but couldn't bring themselves to, so they just turned around and left.  I remember the rest of the staff sitting in the manager's office watching television, they were seeing images of people celebrating in a middle eastern country over what had happened as well as footage of people jumping from the buildings.  To this day I have never watched any of the footage.

I remember Congress singing on the steps of the capitol building.  I remember writing an email to my high school teachers and friends at home.  I remember emailing back and forth with my long distance boyfriend.

A year later I remember sitting in a different room in the same building, on the same floor, and watching the President give his ultimatum to Saddam Hussein and waiting for us to go to war.  It was really quiet that night as we all watched and waited.

I remember a year after that waking up on a cold December morning and turning on the television to see that Saddam Hussein had been found hiding in a hole.  I later remember seeing pictures of his hanging body.

I remember seeing young men and women in uniform every time I went to an airport. I remember my sister calling me in tears because she would also see these young men and women and all I remember her saying was "they are so young, they're just babies."

I remember waking up in Gori and turning on my computer and seeing that Osama Bin Laden had been found, killed and buried at sea.  I remember seeing the images of people celebrating and feeling numb.  I only now realize that it was because it reminded me of the people celebrating 10 years ago. 

I do not remember crying that day.  I am sure that I didn't.  Many people I know shrug it off, say they've never felt scared or nervous, that security screenings are annoying or useless.  Being searched and screened and patted down has become second nature to me.  And really I don't mind it, because I remember.